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Who doesn’t love comic strips? Fascist dictators, terrorists, and maybe blind people, but that’s about it. I mean, how funny is Calvin and Hobbes’ in Braille? Anyway, the point is comics are usually good for a quick laugh, and sometimes make your day. And now that crazy, ubiquitous thing that is the internet doesn’t force you to wait until Sunday to have a chuckle. Here’s a list of my favorite online comics, and when they’re updated.

White Ninja Comics

This comic has a special place in my heart because this comic was born in junior high while doodling in class. I know firsthand how funny those kinds of juvenile drawings can be, and wish I hadn’t misplaced them so many years ago. But these guys kept theirs, and now they’re available to the whole world. Admittedly, some of these strips are pretty hit or miss, but there’s some pure gold in there. The facial expressions alone are great. You’ll see righteous indignation, self satisfaction, complete shock, and incredible sloth. Just be careful if you like turtles, because the white ninja sure doesn’t.

Boy on a Stick and Slither

This is a great cartoon that comes out every Monday and Friday. It’s drawn so simply, but it almost feels animated just because of the backgrounds. It’s primarily a cynical social satire with great one liners, and a few recurring characters. Ever wonder what a Florida Cracker thinks about, or where your baby teeth go? They have tips for kids as well, like this.

Homestar Runner

If you haven’t heard of Homestar yet, or at least Strong Bad, I hope the Spirit rover finds the rock on Mars you’ve been living under, and vaporizes it. And you too. You’re hopeless. Updated “somedays,” which means most Mondays, you’ll be entertained by Strong Bad’s fan mail, and his hilarious responses. Highlights are definitely his take on a kah-razy cartoon and his banned-in-the-UK opinion of British people. There are also short movies, music videos, and even games! Yes it’s got it all, but I’m sure I’m only reiterating what most people already know for themselves.

P.S. Teen Girl Squad #1 through #3 are great, #4 is trying too hard. #5 gets back to form.

Pathetic Geek Stories

If you read the Onion on a regular basis, odds are you know about Pathetic Geek Stories. If not, check ‘em out. Everybody has been mortally embarrassed when they were younger, be it in elementary school when “kids can be so cruel,” or in junior high when you plot to destroy one another. But everybody loved it when it happened to someone else. And this comic provides you with a way of having fun at someone’s expense without ever having met them! Relive the joy of watching the fat kid have a nervous breakdown, or the mortification of totally blowing it with that girl you had a crush on.

You know it’s a good band when a dragon’s giving them props.

Chick Tracts

This is a deceptive name for what’s actually contained within. I can’t imagine how many people have tried chick.com to find pictures of girls and ending up at staring at religious propoganda. These things work in so many ways, except for their intended purpose which is to convert people to Christianity. Scaring kids about the dangers of selling your soul to become a famous rock and roll band sure is funny, and it’s even funnier when you think how seriously Jack Chick is taking it. Not to say anything about evangelism, but do you really want people weak-minded enough to fall for these ploys associated with you? But either way, these stories are hilarious. The dialogue is so contrived, it could only be the product of someone extremely deluded.

Law for Kids

In the same vein as Chick Tracts, Law for Kids tries to “get the word out” about the laws that apply to teenagers. Using the tried and true tactic of “speaking teenager’s language” they create
pitifully unhip flash comics to get confused kids to do the right things. Law for Kids must pride itself on the mantra "If only one person listens, we’ve made a difference." Obviously run by adults hopelessly out of touch with today’s youth, the site offers both cartoons and movies. This one sounds more suspicious than the activity it’s trying to disparage. They make them short, and semi-sweet, with little text, so that delinquents with short attention spans will get the message. The voice talent in the movies is wonderfully deadpan, so much so that you’ll briefly forget what emotion even is! All this and the site’s bizzare obssession with the state of Arizona’s curfew, will make for a couple minutes worth of entertainment. Public service announcements like these are notorious for their political correctness, in addition to their futility, and these are no exception. There’s a girl in a wheelchair shoplifting, an overweight Native American that has an overage boyfriend, and of course the kid with the soul patch and marijuana baseball cap. Look for the posters of bands with tweaked names to avoid royalties.